My Life as a TV Addict

When I was little I did not understand the concept of time zones. I live in the Bible belt and therefore believe that God is on Central Standard Time. Why would we need Eastern or Pacific when God is obviously a Central Standard guy? My lack of time zone understanding came to a head when I discovered You Can’t Do That on Television and could not figure out when to watch it. My desire to watch this piece of Canadian goodness was all consuming. The only option I could see as being valid was to dedicate my life to TV watching; this way I would never miss an episode of anything. Sadly, I kind of really ended up living my life this way. I love television and have developed relationships with the characters that have lasted longer then some of my actual love affairs. The only thing I love more than TV is list making, so I present to you my top five favorite shows and why they are etched in my psyche.

1. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is by far my favorite show of all time. If you have not seen it, I would suggest you stop reading and watch all seven seasons now. The show was created by writer-director Joss Whedon. My love of Joss Whedon verges on creep-tastic and I once spoke to him on the phone thus making that the greatest day ever. Buffy centers around a teenage girl, Buffy Summers, who is the ”chosen one” or “slayer.” It is her job to fight the big nasties of the world. Normally that leads the slayer to a solitary life style, but not this heroine. She has a strong support system called “The Scooby Gang.” The special effects were kind of terrible at the beginning but they were never the point. The point was always a teenage girl who was trying to figure life out. The characters made mistakes and faced the consequences of those mistakes. Have sex before marriage = your boyfriend becomes a horrible deranged vampire. Trust the wrong person = get turned into a crazy hyena person. Kiss your best friend = the ex you wronged falls into a pit and gets stabbed, therefore wishing you never existed and sends your town spiraling into a hellmouth. Damn, I miss this show.

2. Veronica Mars ran from 2004 to 2007 and was created by Rob Thomas; who for years I assumed was the guy from Matchbox 20, but that appears to be incorrect. The show is set in high school and focuses on Veronica who is trying to solve the two mysteries of who killed her best friend and who drugged and raped her at a party. Very adult themes for a show set in high school. The writing was sharp and funny and true to Heather it was a show that used lots of words. The supporting cast was great and no one could play Logan Echolls, tortured bad boy, better than Jason Dohring. I am an adult woman with bills and problems but on Sunday mornings I watch the reruns of this show and yell, “Veronica the answer is Logan Echolls. It always was.” Another reason I am forever in love with this show is that they made great use of Buffy actors after their show ended.

3. Gilmore Girls probably used more words than all of the other shows combined. It was created by Amy Sherman-Palladino and ran from 2000 to 2007. Oh, how glorious were the days when my favorite shows overlapped? Gilmore Girls is about a single mother and her daughter. The show is set in a town called Stars Hollow. I want to live in that crazy little town. I want to get my breakfast Diet Coke at Luke’s Diner and have him bark at me in that I-am-really-a-caring-guy-but-I-try-hide-it way. The dialogue on this show is so quick and full of pop culture references you almost need a Gilmore Girls Guide to watching manual. How could you not love a show that loves pop culture so much it enlists Sebastian Bach of Skid Row fame to play a member of Lane Kim’s band? Damn fine show.

4. Sex and the City has no real redeeming value, yet I love it. The show is based in part on Candace Bushnell’s book of the same name. The show ran from 1998 to 2004. I did not have HBO for part of those years so I have caught up from re-runs and the deliciously awful edited version on TBS. How could I resist a show that uses as much profanity as I do, has a mostly female cast, openly discusses the vulva, and centers on a writer? I think what makes me so enamored with Sex and the City is the relationship between Carrie and Mr. Big. I always not so secretly thought that Trey was my Mr. Big. It was a relationship that seemed doomed to fail but somehow continued to pull through. I was watching the two part finale again the other night and I was beside myself with excitement when Carrie looks up to see Big in the hotel lobby. The mark of a great show may be how satisfied you are with the ending. When I am sad I wrap myself up with a blanket and lose myself in a world of sex, shoes, and cosmos.

5. Sons of Anarchy (Which one of these things is not like the other?), created by Kurt Sutter, who may be certifiably crazy, premiered in 2008 and is still currently on the air. It centers on a motorcycle gang in the town of Charming, California. This show is very violent and not often pleasant to watch, but I am totally sucked in. Trey likes to record an entire season of a show and then watch it on breaks from school. This is the only show that I currently care enough about to fight him on. This season was brutal to watch and beloved series regulars were killed off in the most terrible of ways. The writing and plot are strong and the violence isn’t just there for the sake of blood and ratings. The show follows Jax Teller and his family as they try to figure out how to navigate the real world and the outlaw world. Good show, and waiting for Kurt Sutter to be placed on a 5150 hold is even more entertaining.

Well, those are my five favorite shows of all times. There are many honorable mentions: Boy Meets World, West Wing, Twin Peaks, all were great, but the above five are the ones that I find myself going back to when my brain needs a little break from being my brain.

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